A Boost of Confidence!

This was a great week for weight loss! Last week I had gained 6 pounds, eek! But this week I didn't let food get the best of me, and I lost 7 pounds, hooray! So, last week was the 5K. As I had mentioned, I was head tripping quite a bit about that race...but not about the distance. My dad & I finished that race, and while all of my pre-race topics of anxiety were erased when the race started, unfortunately, somewhere in the middle of the 5K race, I began to think, "I know I can finish THIS race, but I don't know hoooooow I am going to be able to do more than this!" It was an accomplishment to finish the 5K, but that little bead of doubt had stuck with me all week.

This week, our big run was a 4.5 mile run. Our long runs are scheduled for Saturdays, but as noted in my previous post "Tis the Season (Part 4)", there was no room for any exercise on that day. So, I had to move the run to Friday. Unfortunately though, this was my Friday to work in the office, so I had to do the run in the evening. I had soooo much anxiety about this run, and the fact that I had to put it off until the evening and think about it all day, did NOT help! The 5K made me think at some point, I am probably not going to be able to accomplish my wish/goal of running (non-stop) the entire marathon. At some point, I thought, these runs are going to just get too long, and I'm going to have to walk a portion of them before I can get the energy/courage to start running again. Was "4.5 miles" THAT distance!? I didn't want it to be. :0(

After work, the kids and I ran a bunch of errands before the childcare opened up again at the gym...and by the time 4:30pm rolled around, I was tired AND cranky! I did NOT want to do this run AT ALL, and yet I knew that I had to do it...especially since I was cranky, I knew that I needed to sweat the frustration out of my body instead of throwing up the white flag and spending my evening on the couch like a slug (the other alternative in my mind). And seriously, in a single moment, I remembered that Jesus is my strength, and I can do ANYTHING through Christ who strengthens me. So, I made up my mind to do it.

I got on the treadmill, I turned on my new favorite exercising TV channel (none other than The Food Network!), and got to work! I decided that I wouldn't try to break any time records, and I just paced myself. It felt amaaaaazing! Sometimes, even the short 2 mile runs seem like HOURS before they are over, and yet, in this run, it seemed like the miles were flying by! I felt strong. I felt energized. This was the longest run I have ever done in my life. I ran (non stop!) 4.5 miles in 48 minutes. This run was a HUGE confidence booster for me. At some point in those 48 minutes, my nugget of doubt was replaced with a "YES.YOU.CAN!" For this moment, I 100%, truly, and completely believe that I will be able to cross the finish line at the Marathon and feel proud of the effort I gave it!