MELTdown...of the mind, NOT chocolate.

So, I have been great on the diet all week (4 days), and believe it or not, it has not been too difficult...until tonight!

I completely threw a tantrum in my mind, and I just hate when that happens. The tantrum was not only about the diet/my body, but since this blog is not about the details of my personal life, I will keep my comments tailored to the food temptations. (I have you all intrigued now, don't I!?!? You're not really missing out on anything...just a standard female rant about "life isn't fair" for 2 days during any given month...I'm praying that this is one of those 2 days, or I may really be a brat!)

I just get so tired of these mental battles with regard to dieting! I HATE not being able to eat whatever I want! And yet I HATE looking like THIS! I hate that I knew for like 5 months what it felt like to be "thinner" (3 years ago), and that I am having such a hard time getting back there! I hate that I resent knowing what it felt like to be thinner, becuase I am certain that that is my motivation to get back to that "happy place".

I pray that one day soon I will be in a size 10 (or lower) and look back at this time and think, "It wasn't that bad."

The first week(s) are always the hardest, but once I start to see my body slimming down, it gets easier. I've always said that it's not only fun to be at your goal weight (which actually, I have never achieved, lol) but that it's SO much fun to go down each and every size. I just have to be consistent with this until I make it to the next size down...then I'll be happy that I stuck with it. But as of right now, I just want Claim Jumper!

For tonight, I did not go off of the diet...although I DESPERATELY wanted to! :0)